Hey darlings,
Happy Friday! I hope you are doing well. I was at work today covering someone's shift. I finished watching the ITV drama, Mr Bates vs The Post Office, which is pretty shocking and heart-breaking. It is being discussed loads at the moment and it is defo worth a watch if you haven't already.
New Shirt
I purchased a new shirt off vinted a few weeks ago and I paid about £10 for it. I thought it would be really cute with a pair of shorts or like a black shirt, with ballet flats. It is a Fiorucci sample and Fiorucci is one of my favourite brands to shop on Vinted. I am really pleased with it, I love the ruching at the front.
But then... my mum was watching Antiques Roadshow and guess who was wearing the exact same top... Fiona Bruce! I am actually a bit stunned.
Flaky Crazy Makers
So I want to talk about crazy makers. This was a term I read in a self-help book (The Artist's Ways by Julia Cameron) quite a few years ago now and at the time I identified that I was dealing with a Crazy Maker. Just for clarity this is not a current situation but I am writing this because I have seen friends and people I know sort of deal with a crazy maker and as a result this was in my notes of things to blog about. Also if you have watched the TV show Lupin, Assane is a crazy maker- you cannot convince me otherwise.
In the book, Julia is sort of talking about a crazy maker in the creative industry but the type of crazy maker I want to talk about is that person that is inconsiderate of your time and money and let’s you down at nearly every opportunity.
I will go into detail, they will stand you up 2/3 commitments normally with about two hours notice for excuses such as…
- Sorry I can’t come out tonight I did too much coke last night and feeling rough :(
- Grandparents birthday (it’s the birthdays that always got me because it’s not like it’s the same fucking day every year).
- I don’t know if I can come out tonight because I had to wake up early this morning to take my nephew to school (they’re unemployed)
- I’m broke
There is often a bit of a pattern- they will portray themselves as a victim and you will be feeling sorry for them.
Sometimes they don’t even have an excuse. They’re the type of people who you will message to confirm whether they are still good to go out with you later and they will reply ‘I don’t know’- what does that mean? They are just chaotic. They have never heard of a planner or a diary. You will think I am really cold for ranting about people like this but I was patient and understanding for too long. Where was their understanding?
If you are in a relationship with a crazy maker, you have to leave them and soon because life is short and they are making you age prematurely. But I know it’s not always easy if you are sort of caught up in their craziness or you have a crush on them. I am going to give you some advice
- Take their ‘maybe’ as a ‘no’
- Never prioritise their plans over something better- if you can’t decide between idk going with your friends to an event or spending an evening with the crazy maker, go out with your friends. The crazy maker will make you feel guilty but that’s because they are manipulative. Remember they probably would have stood you up anyway.
- If they stand you up, go on your own
- Don’t believe their promises- it could be a night out in a restaurant, a holiday, or some other callous mention of a future together
- Learn from this- once you have left them (and you will leave them) don’t ever put up with this again and spot the signs early on.
- Keep your heart open. Sometimes when you are dealing with a crazy maker you sort of become numb because you put their life before your own. It’s called self preservation.
- It’s okay to doubt their excuses
- Never think it’s because you aren’t cool girl (or cool boy?) enough. They will probably portray you as having zero chill or not being cool enough because you want to be treated with respect. Well then I am not cool.
- Remember their craziness is their doing. Like it’s so important to have like understanding and empathy in a relationship but remember it should be mutual
Revenge Friday
I didn't actually do anything because I had picked up someone's shift at work but I think next week I am planning to go into town. Maybe go to an exhibition or something. I might try and catch the last of the sales but tbh I think they will be over now.
Okay chat next Friday.
Love
Happy Hippo x
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